well, it’s been a great week and a hard one. funny how those two often go together. my best friend left for two years, which is a hard thing. but he’s serving God and bringing others to the light of Christ which is amazing, and a miracle that i’m grateful for. πŸ™‚ so this reflection might be a little more attached to my heart than usual. 

the flowers: chocolate chip pancakes at a&n. last high school race! pushed hard, thought about what i had to do. me & nicole did the jig one last time on the track. sawyer’s art show. lake nox adventures. jessyka & codys wedding reception!!! (i love people who are in love. ❀️) finishing the bourne movie. aaron surprised me and took me to longwood gardens. the HUGEST GREENHOUSE EVER. being happy with him. jensen & abbie’s grad party. jason mraz cds & holding his hand while he drives. SPONTANEOUS NEAR-DEATH TEARING ACROSS ALL LANES OF TRAFFIC TO GET TO SONIC. the family sized box of tater tots (gone in less than 2 minutes). papa johns pizza. teasing him. him teasing me. aaron’s farewell & the spirit that he brought into the room. being so so excited for him & finding peace in his excitement, too. our violin piece went ok! knowing he’s going to be an amazing missionary. long hugs. tribal dinner at the nelsons. aarons open house with everyone that he loves. climbing trees. cute pictures. barefoot. his jacket. flowers. he was set apart as a missionary for the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints. ☺️ “this is a good thing” x1000000. he emailed me. shirts that smell like him. praying for him. trying to be less judgemental & harsh towards others. uno with sawyer. loving ruby more than usual these past couple of days- she kind of fills a small part of a hole. ❀️ getting adorable snail mail from my caseydilla. facetiming monkey arm luke. trying to forgive. praying more. 

the rain: not running as well as i wanted to. track is OVER- FOREVER. so is cross country. 😭 so many lasts… missing a lot of school. crying. saying goodbye. feeling sad. checking my phone habitually by accident. going to call him & realizing i can’t. all the little things i wish i’d asked him & said. his goodbye to the dog. sucking at volleyball. the last goodbye. that hurt that pain that ache. finding a new normal. still being behind on work. college planning. being nervous for summer classes. waking up early. missing him. missing sam. not having anyone to call. πŸ™ƒ 

it’s all for good things, it’s all a part of Gods plan, it’s all going to be ok.